庄子不想要的葬礼

我最近一直在想我爸的事。他身体还好，但是年纪大了，我总觉得应该早点想好，以后要怎么办葬礼，要不要办得体面一点。

I've been thinking about my dad a lot lately. He's still in okay health, but he's getting older, and I keep feeling I should figure out early on how to hold the funeral later, whether it should be done with some dignity.

你说的体面，是指要花很多钱吗？

By dignified, do you mean spending a lot of money?

差不多。我怕办得太简单，别人会觉得我这个女儿不孝顺，不重视他。

Pretty much. I'm afraid that if it's too simple, people will think I'm an unfilial daughter who doesn't value him.

我最近正好读到一个很有意思的故事，是庄子的。他快要死的时候，他的学生们商量着要给他办一个很好的葬礼。

I happened to read a really interesting story recently, about Zhuangzi. When he was about to die, his students discussed giving him a fine funeral.

然后呢？庄子同意了吗？

And then? Did Zhuangzi agree?

完全没有。他说，天地就是我的棺材，太阳和月亮就是挂在我身边的两块玉，这个世界上所有的东西，都已经是送给我的礼物了，我已经有了最好的棺材，你们还想加什么？

Not at all. He said heaven and earth are already his coffin, the sun and moon are two pieces of jade hanging beside him, everything in the world has already become a gift given to him, he already has the finest coffin there is, so what more did they want to add?

这个说法真有意思。那他的学生怎么回答？

That's a really interesting way to put it. So how did his students respond?

学生们说，如果不好好埋起来，怕乌鸦会吃他的身体。庄子就说，埋在地上，是被蚂蚁吃；不埋，是被乌鸦吃。你们从这一个那里把我抢过来，给那一个，为什么这么偏心呢？

The students said if he wasn't properly buried they were afraid crows would eat his body. Zhuangzi said, buried in the ground, it's ants that eat me, not buried, it's crows. You're snatching me away from this one to give me to that one, why be so biased?

我懂了。你的意思是，庄子觉得，选乌鸦还是选蚂蚁，其实都是偏心，因为不管埋不埋，身体最后都会变成别的东西的食物，没有什么区别。

I get it. You mean Zhuangzi felt that choosing crows over ants, or ants over crows, was really just favoritism either way, because whether buried or not, the body ends up as food for something else regardless, and there's no real difference.

对，乌鸦也好，蚂蚁也好，选哪一个都是偏心。重要的东西已经在活着的时候做完了，死后办得多热闹、多体面，跟一个人到底是不是被尊重，其实没有那么大的关系。

Right, crows or ants, choosing either is favoritism. The important things were already done while he was alive, and how grand or dignified the funeral is afterward doesn't actually have that much to do with whether a person is truly respected.

可是我还是会担心，别人怎么看我。如果我办得很简单，我爸的朋友们会怎么想？

But I'll still worry about how others see me. If I keep it simple, what will my dad's friends think?

这个问题庄子回答不了，只有你自己能回答。不过你可以问问你爸，他自己希望怎么办，也许他要的，跟你以为的不一样，也许他既不需要一个热闹的葬礼，也不需要一个真正的棺材。

That question Zhuangzi can't answer, only you can. But you could ask your dad himself what he actually wants. Maybe what he wants is different from what you assume, maybe he needs neither a grand funeral nor a real coffin.